Roles

Maintaining your sanity in difficult family relationships

Maintaining your sanity in difficult family relationships

...It is difficult to modify relationships with the people we have known since we existed. Due to the closeness of these bonds, family can at times feel entitled to knowing things about your life or to having a role in it. When we try to change these dynamics it throws a monkey wrench into the relationship and it feels extremely uncomfortable, like a loose tooth. First: do not make the mistake of interpreting that feeling as an indicator that you are doing something wrong! It’s uncomfortable because you are trying out a new way of being with your family, and you’re not quite sure how to do that yet. Second: you are not destroying your relationships; you’re just making them something that you can actually live with without storing up resentment like barnacles on a boat. If things unravel for a time because you are asserting your right to live healthily, even if it is a life separate from family, their feelings are not your responsibility. They need to deal with their emotions! 

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